40 questions to ask your dad about growing up

Childhood details and coming-of-age stories reveal the experiences that shaped your dad long before you entered the picture. The prompts below help you capture the sensory memories, relationships, and choices that influenced who he is today. Pair them with the interviewing tips in how to interview a relative and the audio checklist in how to record clear, warm voice notes so the conversation feels relaxed and well documented.

How to use this question set

1. Share your intention. Let him know why you want to record these stories and where you will store them.
2. Mix formats. Blend casual conversations (during a drive or walk) with scheduled sit-down interviews.
3. Layer follow-ups. After each answer, ask “What did that look, sound, or smell like?” to gather sensory details.
4. Capture context. Take photos of objects he mentions and note names, locations, and dates for future reference.
5. Respect boundaries. If a topic feels tender, offer to skip or revisit later.

Early childhood prompts

1. What is the earliest memory you can recall with clear detail?
2. Who made you feel safe when you were little, and how did they do it?
3. Describe the home you grew up in—what colours, smells, and sounds stand out?
4. What was mealtime like in your family? Who cooked, and what dishes defined the week?
5. Which family sayings or rules do you still remember word for word?
6. What games or imaginative worlds did you create with siblings or friends?
7. What was your favourite hiding spot or quiet place?
8. Were there any household chores you secretly enjoyed?
9. How did your family celebrate birthdays or milestones when money was tight?
10. What object from childhood would you rescue if you could travel back in time?

School days and learning

11. Who was your favourite teacher, and what made them stand out?
12. How did you get to school each day? Any memorable detours?
13. What subjects came naturally, and which required extra effort?
14. Did you ever get in trouble at school? What happened next?
15. How did you spend recess or lunch breaks?
16. What book, lesson, or experiment shifted how you saw the world?
17. When did you first realise you were good at something academic or creative?
18. Who cheered you on outside the classroom?
19. Were there expectations about grades or careers in your family?
20. How did you celebrate or cope with report cards?

Teenage years and identity

21. What music, radio show, or TV series defined your teenage years?
22. Where did you and your friends hang out, and what did you do for fun?
23. What fashion choices make you laugh now?
24. Did you have a first job? What was your role and pay?
25. Who influenced your sense of style or self-expression?
26. What was your first major purchase, and how long did you save for it?
27. Which adult outside your family treated you like you mattered?
28. How did you navigate peer pressure or big decisions?
29. What milestone made you feel like you were becoming an adult?
30. How did you spend your very first paycheque?

Early adulthood transitions

31. Did you move out on your own? What do you remember about that first space?
32. Who helped you learn the basics of budgeting, cooking, or car maintenance?
33. Which friendships carried you through those years, and how do you stay in touch now?
34. What career path did you imagine versus what actually happened?
35. How did you navigate setbacks such as job loss, exams, or relocations?
36. What advice did you receive that still guides you?
37. What kind of community did you build—roommates, colleagues, neighbours?
38. Did you have any mentors? What did they teach you?
39. When did you realise you wanted to become a parent (or mentor others)?
40. What do you wish younger family members knew about your journey into adulthood?

Follow-up ideas to deepen the archive

• Ask for photos, letters, or playlists tied to specific stories. Scan or photograph them right away.
• Record a short voice memo summarising what you learned and how it shifted your perspective.
• Compare your dad’s answers with grandparents’ stories using the family history questions guide to spot connections or gaps.
• Schedule a follow-up session focusing on a single theme (sports, music, activism) if you uncover rich material.

Quick recording checklist

1. Confirm consent and preferred sharing settings.
2. Use a quiet room with soft surfaces to minimise echo.
3. Position the microphone six to eight inches from his mouth.
4. Capture a test clip and room tone.
5. Label files immediately (e.g., “Dad-GrowingUp-2025-Session01”).

These questions turn casual conversations into a living archive. Start with a handful today, keep notes in your Keepsake workspace, and return to the list whenever you want to add another chapter to your dad’s story.