Questions
Questions of Love: 36 Prompts to Reconnect and Build Intimacy
Guide a 60-minute storytelling session that turns Arthur Aron’s research-backed prompts into a ritual for couples at any stage.
Quick starters
Use these prompts to spark an easy conversation.
- What shared ritual makes us feel close?
- When did you feel proud of us this year?
- What did you learn about love from childhood?
- What’s a future moment you’re excited to experience together?
- How can we support each other better right now?
All questions
We curated 40 thoughtful prompts for couples.
- If you could invite any couple in history over for dinner, who would it be and why?
- What’s a small moment from this month that made you feel loved?
- What ritual do you want us to protect in the next season?
- How did your parents or caregivers talk about love when you were growing up?
- What did you think partnerships looked like before we met?
- When did you know you could be fully yourself around me?
- What’s a song that instantly brings you back to the start of our story?
- Describe the first space that ever felt like “ours.”
- What assumptions do you think outsiders make about our relationship?
- In what ways are we similar that still surprise you?
Show all 40 questions
- Where are we totally different, and how is that a strength?
- How do you define emotional safety today?
- What boundaries help you feel brave in the relationship?
- Which of the five love languages feels most true for you right now?
- What’s a belief about partnership you’ve gladly released?
- What’s a belief about partnership you still hold tightly?
- Tell me about a time we navigated conflict well. What did we do right?
- What story do you want to remember from our toughest season?
- How do you want to feel when you wake up ten years from now?
- What do you want our home to sound like, smell like, and feel like as we age?
- How can we keep encouraging each other’s individual dreams?
- What relationship from your life taught you something about love?
- Who in our family tree modeled the kind of partnership we want?
- Where do you want to travel together purely for storytelling?
- What new tradition would you like to start this year?
- What’s a memory you hope future generations repeat?
- If we created a “relationship time capsule,” what would you put inside?
- How do you want us to celebrate small wins?
- What does intimacy mean to you beyond romance?
- How can we show up better on stressful days?
- What part of our story do you want Keepsake to preserve next?
- What is one thing you wish you told me more often?
- What question have you been nervous to ask me?
- What makes you feel most supported during a hard week?
- What makes you feel playful and light with me?
- If we could create a shared manifesto, what statement must appear?
- How do you want us to navigate life transitions like moves, caregiving, or career shifts?
- What’s a habit we can build to keep learning about each other?
- Which of these questions felt most surprising tonight?
- What promise do you want to make after this conversation?
Conversation guide
Turn this list into an evening ritual: light a candle, cue a playlist, and sit where you can see each other clearly. The 36 prompts borrow from Arthur Aron’s original study but add Keepsake-specific follow-ups so you capture sensory details, feelings, and intentions you can return to later. Plan for about an hour, leaving room to pause, breathe, or journal.
Framing the Conversation
Download the Questions of Love printable deck if you want card-sized prompts you can shuffle or cut out before the session.
Begin by naming why you’re doing this. Maybe you want to celebrate an anniversary, prepare for a life transition, or simply reconnect after a hectic season. Agreed purpose lowers defensiveness and makes it easier to move into vulnerability. Share a quick affirmation like, “We’re here to listen, not fix.” Then set ground rules: you can pass, you can take a break, and everything said stays between you unless otherwise agreed.
We recommend moving through the prompts in three acts, mirroring the study: - Act I: Remembering. Questions 1–12 warm the engine. Add sensory follow-ups - “What did the room smell like?” - to unlock vivid memories. - Act II: Meaning. Questions 13–24 explore values, fears, and lessons. Reflect feelings back and ask clarifiers like, “What made that feel safe?” - Act III: Future. Questions 25–36 point toward shared goals. Write them down so you can revisit them in a month.
After you finish, spend four minutes in quiet connection. If direct eye contact feels uncomfortable, hold hands, sit back-to-back, or trace an object that represents your story. Close by sharing one appreciation and one intention for the week ahead.
Capture What You Hear
You will forget the exact phrasing of your favorite answers unless you save them now. Try one of these keepsake-friendly options: - Record a voice memo. Place your phone between you and tap start during Act II. Later, upload the file to your Keepsake workspace and tag it “Questions of Love 2025.” Revisit How to Record Clear, Warm Voice Notes for mic placement and noise control. - Co-write a reflection. After the session, spend ten minutes capturing highlights in a shared journal. Include direct quotes, sensory details, and your intention for the next month. - Schedule a storytelling session. Use insights from tonight to plan a longer Keepsake interview. Our guide How to Interview a Relative adapts beautifully for couples and close friends.
Tips for Different Seasons
New partners. Stop after Act II if the questions start to feel too intense. Intimacy isn’t a race. The last set will be waiting when your foundation feels ready.
Long-term relationships. Spread the prompts across three evenings and pair each act with a micro-ritual: take a walk, cook a favorite meal, or revisit old photos. Turn Act III into a planning session for the next quarter or anniversary trip.
Long-distance couples. Use video chat with cameras at eye level, and open a shared document so you can capture answers in real time. Mail each other the reflection afterward - handwritten letters count as storytelling too.
Parents and adult children. Rephrase romantic language into “support” or “belonging.” Use question 21 (“What roles do love and affection play in your life?”) to explore how affection looked in different generations. Pair with Questions to Ask Your Mom About Life Before Kids or the new blog 36 Questions to Fall in Love for context.
Reconnecting after conflict. Start with a brief grounding exercise: three deep breaths, then question 29 about sharing an embarrassing moment to lighten the mood. Keep a shared note of future conversations you want to revisit when emotions cool.
Make It a Ritual
The power of the 36 questions isn’t in checking a box once - it’s in turning vulnerability into a repeatable practice. - Quarterly retros. Revisit three favorite prompts at the end of each season and compare how your answers change. - Relationship time capsule. Add one item to a Keepsake box after each session: a photo, a playlist, a sticky note with your favorite quote. - Anniversary interview. Record a video using this list plus two custom questions about the past year. Store it alongside your Keepsake book so future generations can see your evolution. - Support network expansion. Invite close friends, siblings, or another couple you trust. Swap some prompts for those on our Family Reunion Interview Questions page so everyone feels included.
Aftercare
Vulnerability can leave you emotionally wobbly. Build in care: drink water, eat something nourishing, or take a walk together. If a prompt triggered something heavy, schedule follow-up time or consider speaking with a therapist. Keepsake is here to help you hold the joyful and the complex stories.
Write a quick summary a day later. Capture “three things we learned,” “two things we want to try,” and “one gratitude from the session.” Add it to your Keepsake journal or app so you can revisit the insights during stressful weeks.
Finally, celebrate showing up. Doing the questions is an act of love in itself - you carved out time, attention, and curiosity. That’s the stuff strong stories and strong relationships are made of.
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Helpful follow-ups
- What did that moment teach you about us?
- How did that make you feel in your body?
- What do you want us to remember about that story?
- How can we carry that insight into the week ahead?